“On ne voit bien qu’avec le coeur l’essential est invsible pour les yeux.” – (We see with the heart what is invisible to the eyes.) The Little Prince.
We are often told “seeing is believing” and it is assumed that what is meant is that we are seeing with our eyes. But if you think about it, this is never true. Think about something you have not seen with your eyes, but you still believe it exists. This is because we have seen it with our heart so we know it’s true. Conversely, we often say “I see it, but I don’t believe it”, because we haven’t felt it.
This is what is happens when we experience “love at first sight”. We gush to whomever will listen, terms of how perfect the new love interest is; so polite; smart or funny and that we fell in love immediately. But we pull up short when someone asks “what do they look like”?
I think of families and the bonding that occurs between mother and child. The mother sees her baby as a complete picture. She doesn’t see the baby as parts-such as color, gender, two eyes, a nose, a mouth. She doesn’t initially have a ready response when someone asks her what nationality is her child or does the child look more like her father or mother. Often times the first response is patient and thoughtful, or simply “I don’t know, I hadn’t given it much thought”. Then progress to an offhand remark or eventually pretend not to hear because to the parents, the answer is immaterial. The child is simply our son or daughter. We love them no matter how they act or what they look like.
Why do people feel compelled to ask such questions? The new-found love is perfect, no matter the physical details. To the mother the baby is a collective of all that is good and the bond that is created; a bond that can only be created by the heart.
Sometimes the questions are more complicated, but that does not make them more important. What is important is the answer and the best answers come from the heart. Answers that are the change we want to see.
Seeing with the heart, what is invisible to the eyes.